When It Rains, It Pours

Yep, I'm dating again. I've broken through the black hole of match.com and finally found a few that didn't disappear after sending the first wink, email or asking me out for coffee.

It all started with Elvis and took off from there.

Last week, on a whim, and not having my daughter on a school night, I was having a first phone call with someone I'd been emailing with. At 10, I said we could've been out for coffee and home already with all the time we spent on the phone. The suggestion sparked the reality and I was in the car on the way to meet Bachelor #1. He was very friendly and complimentary, but I really wasn't feeling the spark. I still thought I might see him again because you just never know.

At the same time, Bachelor #2 emerged from the black hole. We had emailed and he gave me his number and asked me to call. I left a message and never heard back. I gave my match.com membership and profile for all of 5 days but realized when I wasn't getting my refund to get back on there. I reactivated and sent him an email: "whatever happened to you?" He wrote back that he had deleted my number figuring he had it on caller ID, but I had done a call block so he lost it...and then my profile was missing. I granted him his stay of execution and he and I have a date for tomorrow. There was no great banter on the phone, but he's good relationship material, very nice and very local...and flat out looking for a long term relationship. What a refreshing change of attitude from the men I've dated over the past 3 years.

Also, Bachelor #3 wasn't much of an email guy and sent me his phone number. Usually I require some online chatting up front but I figured I've missed out on this stuff for almost 9 months so let's cut to the chase. Great banter, lots of teasing and yet we're both left wondering what the heck is he/she thinking. Pure trouble, but isn't that the most fun? We had our first date yesterday afternoon, for lunch, when I joked "where are we going for lunch," on the phone. He took me up on it and about an hour and a half later he was down from West Palm Beach for lunch. He left me hanging with a mysterious smirk and my not knowing whether he liked me or not. Five hours later, he drove down again from WPB and we had date number two. He had been given the warning that just because I let him into my house, doesn't mean he's making it to the bedroom. A lot of teasing and wondering on both sides what the other was really thinking, and then finally he asked me straight out "so, are you interested?" Duh! I told him when a woman throws her legs across his lap, it's a good sign. He told me if I didn't want to find out whether he was interested then I should remove my legs because I'd be feeling it pretty soon. I finally got a "you're so cute" out of him. Sheesh! What's it take to get a compliment in this town??? He reminded me that nothing would happen since he'd been given a stern warning and he was being a gentleman and respectful. GRRRRR, kiss me damnit!!! We ended it with a hug, he kissed the top of my head, then as he walked out the door turned and said "call me tomorrow, please." He's fun, I like that one. Not sure about potential for long term, but we'll see.

Back at the ranch, I've still been emailing with another nice gentleman who has my number but has yet to take the initiative to call. You snooze you lose buddy.

I Went Out with Elvis and He Brought Along Neil Diamond

I took a chance and went on a date with my first match.com guy that didn't disappear into the black hole. I knew he was an entertainer and comedian, but I finally got out of him that one of his shticks is being an Elvis impersonator.

Saturday night I was supposed to be going out with my friend and meeting my cousin at Crabby Jack's for Karaoke Night. It was the first weekend in three that I didn't have my daughter and I was ready to go play. I'd also invited Elvis, who I later realized I'd seen perform at Karaoke Night a few months earlier, to come join us. In the end, the friend and cousin bailed, so I tracked Elvis down to let him know I wouldn't be there. At that point, he mentioned his friend to me, a nice man that helps him with his gigs and likes to go to Karaoke Night, as well. Turns out he's the famous "Tony Diamond" from Crabby's...I knew exactly who he is. Elvis turned it around on me and invited me to go take Tony out for karaoke, somewhere else.

It was a lovely little get together. I never really spoke with Tony before, all those times I'd seen him at Crabby's. He's a very nice man (who apparently has something he takes thorazine for) and was a gentleman. Elvis took me to his van to listen to some of his CD's, both his Garth Brooks and other impersonator ones and some original songs. Another nice guy, but I could tell he wasn't attracted. Extra points for still being friendly despite that. I knew as soon as I saw his weightlifter physique and hearing a few questions about whether men hit on me when I went out, I had a feeling he wouldn't be attracted to me.

I thanked them both for a nice evening and we went our separate ways. The next day, I sent the thank you email and let Elvis know that even if there were no love connection, I always enjoy making new friends. He responded that he would be honored to be my friend. We've exchanged a few light emails, as such, since. I'm sure I'll see him around again, but as for dating...onward and upward!

Ommmmmmmmm

It's been awhile since I've written, so I've got to push myself back a couple of weeks. I think we have the psychosis under control now. I'm not feeling completely relaxed, but I do have a sense of calm back. I still get excited and rushed and a little bit fidgety, but it's about 95% back to my baseline quirkiness.

So I am put on some medication that we'll just call a "mood stabilizer" to help with my racing thoughts and what I see as compulsiveness. Dr. Always Runs Late But No One Warns Me When I Call Ahead to Confirm believes this will help with my weight, as well. And I'm all thrilled at the prospect of the miracle drug that will help me gain my composure and work alongside my theory of overeating as a form of OCD. However, as I'm scratching my body raw and noticing these ugly bumps, Dr. Always Runs Late But No One Warns Me When I Call Ahead to Confirm asks me if I'm having any side effects. As I'm scratching away, I say no and then the lightbulb comes on. "Ohhhhh, that's what this rash must be from." She agrees, yet advises me to up the dosage but call if the rash gets worse. Fast forward to the rash getting worse, the doctor being on vacation and the office advising me to call my regular doctor.

Second issue is that I'm not feeling better. I'm embarrassed that people around me sense that I'm losing my mind and I'm starting to feel sick, that I'm really sick and it's screwing with my brain. I hate the thought that I'm the same drug that they give to people with OCD and Bipolar Disorder, regardless of whether it's also the drug now being prescribed to help with weight loss. I focus on the crazy indications. So I feel crazy and I'm walking around scratching all day...not attractive and definitely appears as crazy. Crazy is as crazy does?

I spend the weekend with two friends. One, without question, has serious issues. I know there's arguments that I shouldn't bother having with her, because they stem from her issues and nothing that I've done or said. The other one seems at peace, relaxed, takes life as it comes and faces challenges on a daily basis that I couldn't imagine. I decide that I don't want to be perceived the same way as the one with the issues and if the other one can find peace with her bumps in the road, so can I. That's it, meds are gone, I'm going to learn to just relax and stop with the drama. And that's what I did.

Today, I finally did go to my regular doctor - two weeks and major scratching and bruises from scratching later - to take care of the rash. It should be gone by the time I hit Niagara Falls for my Single Parents Mingle GTG, the motherload of get togethers, and hopefully, I'll be 98% back to me.

Now the original me will probably never exist again. She's got some new war wounds and issues to contend with, and a hell of a lot less hair. But change is good. We'll find out how others deal with it.